Footnotes is a semi-monthly newsletter sent to Carol Stream residents and church members, written by Pastor Phil Wood

fun, with a small "f": A philosophy of Youth Ministry

Reprint of Past Articles

Conflict and Gossip

Could you imagine having a loved one hurt in a tragic fire only to learn that your friend idly watched the blaze begin, or worse yet, actually added fuel to it? Though your friend didn’t actually start the fire, you would certainly feel that they shared the responsibility and you would probably feel betrayed.

The Bible compares gossip, backbiting, and negative speech to a blaze that is out of control. James writes, Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth? And the tongue is fire…

Could you imagine walking into the church nursery, watching the start of a fire and then turning away without any action? Certainly, throwing a little gas on the fire would be wrong, but not attempting to put out the fire would be equally wrong.

Apart from an act of God, nothing could destroy a church building and do more harm to the occupants in a shorter amount of time than a fire. Similarly, nothing can destroy a real church, the local family of believers, quicker that the fire of a critical tongue.

Fellowship Church is a family. Do you have a problem with a brother or sister? Then either talk about them to the Lord or talk to them. If the tongue is like fire, then we know it can do considerable damage if it is allowed to run wild, but it can also do a whole lot of good if it is harnessed and confined to the right purposes.

Next time you walk into the church basement and see a fire in the place that is not supposed to be, please put it out. Others really won’t mind, in fact, in the long run they will probably recognize you as a hero.

Don’t use bad language. Say only what is good and helpful to those you are talking to, and what will give them a blessing. Ephesians 4:29 (TLB)

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Just Throw Me in a Hole: Cremation

Always be ready at any moment to preach, pray, or die. That was the advice given to me by one of my mentors as I prepared for the ministry. What he didn’t tell me was, Always be ready to answer all types of questions.

During my years in church work I’ve been able to avoid most of the How many angels can fit on the head of a pin or Did Adam and Eve have belly buttons type questions, but probably the most frequently asked single question is . . . Pastor, what does the Bible say about . . . cremation.

For many people cremation just doesn’t seem right, but they don’t know why. Their consciences may be tender because of the history of cremation, because of preachers that have condemned the practice, because of churches that have refused a proper funeral for the cremated, or because of a western culture that has only recently embraced it.

For others, it makes perfect sense and is the best use of resources.

Overall, the Bible is somewhat silent on the issue, unless there is validity in an argument from silence. Consistently the pattern of Scripture is that the body of the deceased was honored and carefully laid to rest in a grave after they had fallen asleep (died). In some cases, as with Joseph, it was so important how and where he was laid to rest that the body, years after death, was exhumed and moved to a new sight.

On the other hand, when cremation was recorded in the Bible, particularly the Old Testament, it was an act of disrespect to bring either judgment or dishonor to the deceased and his kin (Joshua 7:24-26; Amos 2:1).

Regarding resources, a drive through Wyoming, Wisconsin or even the bulk of Illinois gives confidence that the American soil can spare 12 square feet and a piece of granite for some poor soul. Even millions of graves will not overrun our countryside.

Regarding funeral finances, the end of someone’s life is not the time to count pennies. Extravagance is not necessary, and even distracting, but being overly frugal may cost more in pain and grief then you could ever predict. In my limited experience, cremation has often interrupted the grief process.

If I were speaking on this subject, now would be a time for a good joke. We get uneasy with such subjects because we know, while some things in life can be avoided, death has 100% cooperation. But for the Christian, that is OK. We know in whom we have believed and we know where we are going. We don’t need to go kicking and screaming. Jesus Christ has defeated death for us and has taken away its sting.

But when I do go, I want that experience to be my final shot at reflecting the image of God to a fallen world. I hope my life has reflected God, and I pray my death will as well.

When my body someday is prepared for burial, my family is sending the message this is not the end. Care and respect for the body not only honors the One who created that body, but also signals that the body has a future in the resurrection. Each burial is a visual of how our Lord was laid in a tomb and as they aim me toward the east, it is one last reminder that another child of God was put to rest, waiting for that great morning when the Lord shall return to this earth.

Unlike Mark Twain, the report of my death will probably not be greatly exaggerated. Another wag has said, I don’t mind dying, I just don’t want to be there when it happens. What a contrast to D. L. Moody who, near the end of his life, said, Soon you will read in the newspapers that Moody is dead. Don't you believe it, for I shall be more alive than I am now.

Though I have an obvious preference concerning this issue, I don’t know that I have the strongest of feelings. Each individual and family has a choice to make according to their convictions and I don’t know that the Bible is clear enough for us to be too dogmatic. What I regret, however, is the lost opportunity to be another reminder of Christ to this world. Christian burial has the potential to point to Christ, cremation sends another message. However, more important than our dead bodies being an object lesson that points people to Christ, the greater question is, Are we living lives that point people to Jesus?

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Family First

Can you imagine how simple life must have been in those early days after creation? First, there was just a man, his wife, plus God and His creation. It doesn't seem that life could get any better than that. Of course, on this earth, it didn't. After that arose a sinful conflict with finger-pointing and separation, then children came along with all the first-time stresses there, followed by the inevitable sibling rivalry which ultimately resulted in the loss of a child. Well, you know the rest of the story . . .

Anyhow, it wasn't until after the Lord instituted the family that he began to surround people with resources to help with living. Government came later. The church, it came later. Even grandparents and uncles, neighbors and distant cousins were introduced down the road. Everything followed the primacy of that initial nucleus of a man and a woman becoming one and setting up a home.

The nuclear family is the most basic building block of the fabric of our society. Every family that falls apart is like another brick taken out of the wall. Every family that succeeds strengthens all of us. The family is first in priority and it is first in responsibility.

One parent asked, "Why hasn't the school taught my child how to write his name?" That parent obviously missed the idea that it is the family's responsibility to teach the child, the school is their to merely support the program of the home. It is also true of the church. A parent may wonder why the church is not straightening out their child. Fundamentally and ideally, the church should not be using families to support their program, the programs of the church are in place to support what the home is already doing. Unfortunately, in too many cases the church and government is having to do what the home is neglecting, and the more they do this, the more many parents are willing to let them do even more.

As a parent, I don't want to hand off some of the greatest fringe benefits of parenting. The joy of being there when my child takes his first steps, learns her numbers and colors, learns to pray or sing songs about Jesus, writes his own name for the first time, or when she is introduced to the wonder of life. Maybe I can't teach him everything, but I want to be there to teach him the basics.

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fun, with a small "f": A philosophy of Youth Ministry

"If you don’t like it, just come home!" my dear Momma said, as I walked out the tarmac to the plane. That was probably the last thing this scared, about-to-be-college-freshman needed to hear. Though I’m sure all my dear mother wanted was to spare me from being unhappy, the offer to "quit without dishonor if you’re not having fun" was almost too good to pass up.

Not unrelated, I recently met with a group of parents to discuss the priorities of our youth ministry. Second only to teaching the Bible, "fun" was at the top of the list—and my church isn’t the only one concerned about having it. Not long after that meeting, I met with a young man who had been on the youth staffs of two of the largest and hottest churches in the Chicago area. As we ate lunch that hot August day, he explained to me that he had been trained to program for "having fun." So, no, we’re not alone. But I’m not sure this is a place that we all want be together on. After all, where should "fun" really fit into our philosophy of youth ministry?

Last evening, I sat with over one hundred parents at a freshman orientation meeting for a private preparatory school. Some of the parents there are paying as much as $10,000 each year to have their child enrolled. Now, I’m sure they all want their children to enjoy their educational experiences, but are they going to shell out $40,000 over the next four years just so their child can "have fun"? There are a lot cheaper ways to get a thrill.

Similarly, for years, my wife has dragged all four of our children to the next town over for piano lessons. Over the course of that time, we’ve helped pay off this instructor’s second home—and not just to let our children experience a half hour of weekly fun, accented by an additional 30 minutes of daily practicing joys. I know our children enjoy their teacher, and the skills they’ve learned, but I’m not sure the word "fun" would even enter the equation.

And think about taking swimming lessons at the park district pool. We show up with hopes that our children will enjoy the water and their lesson times. But we pay to walk away with kids who won’t sink to the bottom if they fall into the lake. Similarly, we want all of our athletic coaches to make games enjoyable experiences, but we also expect them to impart skills, instill discipline, and build character.

We’ve all had classes, seminars, and conferences ad nauseam that have helped us to make our programs and subject matters more interesting, powerful, captivating, and yes, fun. And there’s no reason to avoid having fun. No piano lesson, football practice, or Sunday school class should be anti-fun. But that doesn’t put "fun" on the top of the list.

So why is it that when the kids come home from school, we ask: "Did you learn anything new today?" And when they get back from practice we ask, "Was your coach able to help you with that fast ball?" But when they get back from youth group we ask, "Did you have fun tonight?" It’s as though we place a greater priority on getting a high score on the ACT or on learning how to do the breaststroke than on seeing our children develop spiritually.

"Are we having fun yet?" may continue to be the cry of the junior-higher who shows up for a church activity for ages to come. But when parents and youth workers listen too closely to that song, they will pay a price. George Barna reports that almost 80% of our twenty-somethings are not plugged in to a church on a regular basis. Many of them used to be, but they were also conditioned to church being about them and their fun. Once they’re out of youth group, however, and all the church seems to offer are boring sermons about things like prayer and parenting, and boring music like "Amazing Grace," it’s not fun any more. Since "fun" was all church was about, they’ve got no reason to stick around—and they don’t.

While I sat discussing youth philosophies with the young minister on that hot August day, my teenage son was at his "two-a-day" football practice at the local public high school. When he got home that evening, he had barely crawled out of his convertible, nursing aches and pains, when I hit him with my question:

"Josh, is football practice ‘fun’?" His droll but profound answer came without missing a beat.

"The fun comes on game night."

Teens today, like young people of ages past, are not looking for another funhouse to enjoy. They’re looking for a cause and a purpose to give themselves to. The church is too limited in resources and time to sacrifice its purpose on the altar of fun. Now, I hope our youth group is fun, but it just shouldn’t start there. And I know that if they get equipped with what they need to face the world they live in, then it will end there. I don’t know about you, but I want our youth ministry to be fun like I want football practice to be fun. After all, game night’s coming.

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People or Priest:

Missing article.........

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A Look at Local Church Government

Every once in awhile a child will ask me as the pastor, Do You own the church? My response is, No Virginia, God owns the church. But often that answer is not enough for inquiring minds, both young and old alike. It is legitimate to ask, apart from God, who on earth owns the church and how is it run?

The physical assets of Fellowship Church are in the name of a non-profit corporation named Fellowship Church of Carol Stream. Should the church ever dissolve, the assets would be sold off and distributed to other not-for-profit organizations who have a similar mission and belief.

Regarding the question of who runs the church, our goal, as with everything we do, is to follow the direction of the Word of God and to be Holy-Spirit led.

In the Bible there is no definite model for church government. G. Campbell Morgan wrote "I do not believe there is any final word in the New Testament as to ecclesiastical government." (Living Messages of the Book of the Bible, p. 81). As new local churches were established in the Scriptures, some of them looked more like a dictatorship. The organizational chart had one person on them, possibly Paul or Timothy, and they were single-handedly appointing people to other positions. At other times the church was more like a democracy, such as when the church at Jerusalem had swelled in size and influence and the body at large was called upon to decide who would be selected as the first deacons. Early on, decisions were made for the church at Jerusalem by a board of elders, with James as the "first among equals."

The form of church government, or in essence how the church is really led, has divided the church for centuries. Consider even many of the modern day denominations. Their name and their distinctive quality is wrapped up in the fact that they are led by either a presbytery, an episcopate, or the congregation. Within evangelicalism many churches were divided over the last 25 years as it became in vogue to have an "elder-rule" church rather than a "congregational-rule" form of government. In many instances nothing changed in how the churches functioned, but many pastors and people alike were hurt in the sometimes contentious process of converting the church constitutions.

In reality, most effective churches function the same regardless of the official form of church government. There are gifted leaders, there are committed followers, and people are aware of their roles. A church however, needs do function decently and in order, and proper procedure and protocol needs to be followed.

In my opinion, the lowest yet also the very highest form of church government is what Ignatius called the "monarchial episcopate." (Kurt Aland, Saints and Sinners, p. 42) It would be the highest if Christ were seated on the throne ruling. It is the lowest when the seat is occupied by a mere man (or woman). Ignatius felt this position was necessary to protect the doctrinal purity of the church, which, of course, led to the idea of a Pope, but it ultimately stripped the local churches of their autonomy and authority and it over-escalated a single human being.

A higher form, but in my opinion still inferior, is "elder rule." Especially when the elders are tenured and only new elders are appointed by the elders. There are not enough checks and balances in this system and it is rooted in the assumption that the majority (even in a church) could not be right. It violates the theological truth of the priesthood of the believer and is an insult to a mature congregation.

The highest form of church government that we can experience on this earth is "congregational rule." There is biblical precedent for this in Acts 6 when the body is called upon to appoint their own deacons. The early church in Acts is probably the purest and finest church recorded in all of the New Testament thus making it the premier example. Even in the early church The "Teaching of the Twelve" says "appoint for yourselves bishops and deacons . . . for their ministry to you is identical with that of the prophets and teachers. Therefore do not despise them" (chapter 15). The people did the appointing and the pastors and deacons where necessary for practical and obvious reasons. Consider also the theological argument that no one in Christ is inferior, all believers have the same Holy Spirit dwelling within them, we are all appointed priests, and we are no longer in need of human mediator to approach the throne of grace. There is also the practical argument. Consider the government of the nations of the worlds. Would you prefer to live in a democracy where the voice of the people is heard and representatives are chosen for practical reasons, in a pure parliament where a few elite control all with no outside checks and balances, or in a monarchy where one has the final word on everything? It has been suggested that Thomas Jefferson observed and used the framework from the church government of a baptist church in Virginia to help engineer the United States constitution.

With a conviction that the Word of God approves of a congregational form of church government, that our standing in Christ is best demonstrated in this form, and that it is the safest and most effective way to govern, Fellowship Church, as defined by our constituion is a church where the congregation votes, where deacons deal with the business of the church and are appointed by and answerable to the congregation, and the pastors, elders, or bishops are those individuals, typically vocational, who commit themselves to serving and leading the church by focusing upon prayer and ministry of the Word. Ideally, especially as the church grows, there will always be a plurality of pastors.

The people in the various offices are there to not use people to build a great church, but to utilize the church to build great people. Similarly, those with position in the church are merely servants. Martin Luther wrote "Their governemnt is not a matter of authority or power, but a service and an office, for they are neither higher not better than other Christians. "All Christians are, on the basis of the priesthood of all believers, clergymen and bishops with all privileges. Only for the sake of good order are some ordained for special service." The highest office in evangelical Christianity is the office of pastor, or shepherd; what goes beyond that is different only in service, not in rank. And finally, it is not bishops and pastors who make the church. According to article seven of the Augsburg Confession, the church is wherever "the Gospel is taught purely and the sacraments are administered rightly" (Aland, p. 44).

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Why I am a Teetotaler

The headlines on the front page of the Daily Herald yesterday were bone-chilling. In one case a college student from the area died of binge drinking and the other headline told of a drunk driver hitting a tree and killing his 2 best friends. Today the front page headlines were not much different. A man with a history of DUI’s killed a highway worker and a group of area teens are on probation at school for underage drinking

Ever since the church began almost 2,000 years and even dating back to the night Noah tied one on after his Mediterranian Cruise, alcohol use and abuse has been an issue among believers. Timothy, a disciple with a son-like relationship to the Apostle Paul, resisted absolutely any use of it. Paul urged the young pastor to overcome his inhibitions and to breakout the church key for at least medicinal reasons, but we don’t know if Timothy heeded his advice or not. In the same letter, however, Paul warned of appointing church leaders who was not beyond reproach in this area.

How does casual use of spirits today compare to the winebibbers of the Bible? Actually, they don’t. In ancient days, and actually not too long ago even in America, beverage choices were very limited. Namely, water or preserved fruit juices. For instance, only one Greek word was used to describe both grape juice and wine. New oinos was put in new wine skins, old oinos was what was found in old wine skins. Maybe some learned to prefer the aged variety, but the alcohol content was not necessarily the goal. It was a byproduct of preserving a nutritious drink. The oinos of Jesus’ day was so watered down that one would have to linger all day drinking to get a buzz. Thus, the drunkards had other issues as well, i.e., laziness and idleness.

When Jesus performed His first miracle at the Cana wedding, it stands to reason he delivered fresh, new oinos. With welches not being invented yet, fresh new wine, would have been quite a delicacy. It is hard to imagine that Jesus’ first miracle would be one of decay and decomposition, but rather life and freshness.

Drunkenness is absolutely forbidden in the Bible. The 11^th commandment, however, is definitely not Thou shalt not drink alcohol nor should we make it the litmus test for fellowship with other believers. Yet, the principles of the Bible have led me to run when the cork gets unscrewed.

1. Alcohol kills brain cells—I don’t have enough to spare!
2. Alcohol is a depressant—can’t life be depressing enough?
3. It is too strong to have as a foe—Wine is a mocker and beer a brawler; whoever is led astray by them is not wise (Proverbs 20:1).
4. I don’t like to drink alone and I am cautioned about sharing it with others—Woe to him who gives drink to his neighbors, pouring it from the wineskin till they are drunk (Habakuk 2:15).
5. I can’t hang out at the bars—Do not join those who drink too much wine (Proverbs 23:20).
6. I am forbidden to get drunk—If only one drink begins to affect a person’s judgment, by the time I have figured out I’m drunk, it’s already too late.
7. I stand to hurt and tempt more people than I can help—Would you, or maybe the struggling alcoholic be encouraged with me walking out of Jewel-Osco with a sixer?
8. Much of our society are alcoholics waiting to happen—that is a door I don’t want to be responsible for opening to my children.
9. I’m too cheap—alcohol is a luxury I can’t afford.
10. It tastes crummy—It’s an acquired taste that I don’t care to acquire.

Benjamin Franklin, in a pre-Pepsi day with not a whole lot of beverage choices, made it his goal to "never drink to excite or eat to dull." If that’s the case, what’s the use in drinking? The Secretary of the great state of Illinois tells me that spirits of today are so potent that the very first one will begin to have an impact upon the average person. The first thing to go, he says, is sound judgment.

Alcohol has its place. Proverbs says it is a good medicine for the dying and hopeless. I’m not ready to join that crowd and I don’t want a second of this life or an opportunity for the next to pass me by because of a self-induced stupor. I’m stupor enough, the last thing I need to do is to help it along.

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Nobody Christians and Nobody Churches

In your mind have you labeled someone a nobody? In junior high they are the wallflowers who never ask questions in class or make lively conversation in the lunchroom. At high school they show up when the bell rings, leave after last period and if they by chance attend the twenty year reunion, no one even remembers their name. They work in the back office, live at the end of the cul-de-sac, and drive a white sedan or a minivan. At the end of their days they sit in urine-soaked hallways with white hair and blank looks on their faces. They look so plain, uninfluential, and one-dimensional. Then one day you are called to do their funeral.

You learn you had only seen a snapshot or two of their lives: maybe their last days in a nursing home or the few hours they spent at school. But the people and the stories begin to come together like the still pictures that make up a full-length movie and you see in living color how many lives this solitary life touched. They birthed children and mended fences and erected towers. They helped and they hurt and many people’s lives are different because they existed.

Driving through a neighborhood, one can get the same sensation as walking down the hall of the convalescent center. Hollow looking buildings with white steeples squatting on little tiny parcels of land. Sometimes the lights are one, but rarely is someone home. Call on the phone and they don’t answer, go to the door and it is locked, visit on Sunday and there are only a handful. The snapshot you see is pretty dreary, but you are often missing the full-length mosaic. Children that found the Lord in that congregation, couples that were married in the building, people that were counseled or helped by the pastor.

A few years back the book and movie, Thursdays with Maury, taught many of the depth that can be gained from time spent with an apparent nobody. It is quickly learned that it is the nobodies that make up the world and they have a depth and richness that is often not apparent to any but those who have been blessed by their presence.

The majority of Christians in the world drink deeply from the seemingly unimportant, uninfluential local churches. While professional sport teams boast crowds of tens of thousands, it is only a small fraction of a typical week of church attendance. Where are they all going? They are disappearing into little churches, emerging refueled, encouraged, and ready for the mission God is leading them on.

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Coming Out of the Closet: The Christian’s response to Society’s woes

The voter turnout was huge; the controversy was great. But I believe in my heart that the American people have voted for and elected the right man to continue serving as President of the United States. I believe God has blessed us and answered our prayers with President Bush.

Now we can sit back and do nothing until the next election stirs us, until we become angry over an errant piece of legislation, or until the appointment of a new Justice. Right?

As Christians, we’re often great at mobilizing, organizing, and legislating—but just "putting out fires" is not the best way to influence our world. The side of Morality has had some narrow victories lately, but the war is far from over.

Two issues rose to the top in this past election, and both are pretty basic to life and the quality of living. Those issues were the protection of human life and the protection of the family. Now that the election is over, what should we do at the grassroots level?

First, all believers should go back into their closets and pray (Matthew 6:6). "Pray this way for . . . all who are in authority, so that we can live in peace" (1 Timothy 2:2, NLT). Shame on us if we don’t hold up our local, national, and world leaders specifically in prayer on a regular basis.

Next, we need to find legitimate ways of answering the cries of our society in a compassionate and caring way. Once again, Christians are great at sending

articles of clothing to children in some far off land while neglecting the kid next door who’s just a couple years away from being pregnant, on drugs, and, as far as the parents are concerned, homeless.

Immoral sex and unwanted babies are everyday issues in our homes, churches, and neighborhoods. We need to volunteer at and support crisis pregnancy centers, we need to adopt and provide foster care when feasible, and we need to reach out in love to the troubled young people in our sphere of influence and care.

In their younger years, the Tregays and Mrs. Newton took in foster children. Between the two families, over 100 foster children received love and care in their homes. Where are the young families today in our church that will take up that cause? Everybody knows a family that has adopted, and from my perspective, adoption brings joy to everybody.

Similarly, homes all around us are crumbling. Why aren’t we taking struggling couples out for dinner, or finding ways of offering hope and encouragement if they’ll just hang in there? How about the children of broken homes who are falling in the cracks?

Also, it seems that the more Christians vacate the prayer closet, the more comfortable homosexuals feel about coming out of theirs. Is there any surprise between the connection? Of course, when people choose to make their private sexual habits and desires public, they are inviting public opinion. So when you see someone who is going out of their way to get attention and make a statement, go out of your way to give them a response. By no means show them hate or disgust, rather, reach out in love with the Gospel of Jesus Christ that can give them both forgiveness and freedom from their sins.

It’s nice to have the right people in office, but the ultimate answer to our societal woes is Jesus Christ. Jesus has left us on this earth to make a difference until he returns and sets everything straight. Let’s get busy.

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